You made it through the week to another Friday! Congratulations, and good morning!
You’ve undoubtedly heard the phrase “forgive and forget,” or perhaps the longer version “it’s easier to forgive than to forget.” The origin of this saying is a little hard to pin down.
The Bible suggests as much in several instances, though doesn’t quite word it that way. One version that comes close: “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:14).
The closest we can get to the actual quote is a line by author Miguel de Cervantes, who wrote “Let us forget and forgive injuries,” in his 17th Century book “Don Quixote.” Williams Shakespeare also employed the concept – though, again, not the exact turn of phrase – in several of his plays.
We probably all know to one degree or another that harboring ill will toward someone really only eats us up inside. The person we’re angry suffers less, arguably, than we do ourselves by holding on to such strong negative feelings.
If that’s indeed the case, though, why is it so damn hard to say “I forgive you” to someone who has truly hurt us and done us wrong?
According to a wide variety of experts with varying degrees of credentials who have opined on the subject on the interwebs, there are a variety of reasons why it’s difficult to let go of anger and resentment. They include but are not limited to:
- Fear of being hurt again.
- Resentment
- A sense of injustice
- Deep emotional pain
- Difficulty rebuilding trust
I’m sure there are other reasons, but these seemed the most logical to me. I did learn, though, from the Mayo Clinic, that some people are naturally more inclined to forgive than others. This was something I didn’t know – like you can be genetically programmed to let go of things? This is wild.
For those of us who are not hard-wired that way. (Is there a test for this or something? I’d kind of like to know for sure…) there are some tips and tricks for training yourself to be better about lettings things go. They include but are not limited to:
- Practicing empathy (trying to see things from the other person’s point of view)
- Trying to remember times when someone else granted you forgiveness and how you felt about it (grateful, hopefully)
- Talking it out with someone other than the individual who wronged you
- Recognizing that forgiveness is a practice and a skill that can be honed
If you can’t get there for the sake of the other person, perhaps you can start by forgiving for a selfish reason: Holding onto a grudge can actually be bad for your health, and who among us really wants to be unhealthy? Chronic anger can depress your immune system, increase levels of stress and anxiety, raise your blood pressure, contribute to insomnia and more.
Forgiveness is so important that there are multiple days devoted to it. There’s Global Forgiveness Day (July 7). National Forgiveness Day (Sept. 1). National Forgiveness & Happiness Day (Oct. 7). International Forgiveness Day (the first Sunday in August). The National Day of Forgiveness (today, Sept. 27).
There are also a number of religious holidays during which one is encouraged to admit wrongdoing and ask for pardon. Yom Kippur, which is coming up on Oct. 11, is a chance for Jewish people to reconcile themselves with G-d. Ashura is a Muslim holiday that isn’t necessarily as focused on atonement, but from what I can tell, that is an element of the day.
In short: You’ve got LOTS of opportunities to hone your forgiveness skills.
Today will be partly cloudy and dry with intervals of clouds and sun. Temperatures will be in the mid-70s. The weekend is looking not too bad. Tomorrow, we’ll see mostly cloudy skies. Sunday will be cloudy, too. Both days will be dry (thus far, anyway) with temperatures again topping out in the mid-70s.
In the headlines…
Federal prosecutors unsealed a stinging indictment against New York City Mayor Eric Adams, alleging he took bribes from Turkish nationals for nearly a decade.
Adams was charged with five counts, including bribery, fraud and soliciting illegal foreign campaign donations. He was ordered to appear in Federal District Court in Manhattan today for an arraignment before a magistrate judge.
The criminal charges — the first against a sitting mayor in the city’s modern history — were laid out in a 57-page document alleging Adams acquiesced to Turkish requests in return for years of free travel, accommodations, and illegal campaign donations.
Adams faces conspiracy, wire fraud and bribery charges in a five-count indictment outlining a decade-long trail of corruption that began when he served as an elected official in Brooklyn and continued through his mayoral administration.
The investigation into Adams is continuing, U.S. Attorney for the Southern District Damian Williams said, calling the charges against the mayor “a grave breach of the public’s trust,” and adding: “We continue to dig, and we will hold more people accountable.”
Williams’s ascent to the Southern District’s top post followed years of tumult in the office, which has long guarded its independence from Washington, earning it the nickname the Sovereign District.
At a news conference outside Gracie Mansion following the unsealing of the indictment, Adams said he doesn’t plan to resign, telling reporters that he hopes New Yorkers will wait to hear his legal team’s defense before making any judgments.
If Adams stands firm, there are two players who can force him from office. The first is a committee of city officials. The second is a friend: Gov. Kathy Hochul.
Hochul told reporters at an event in Syracuse yesterday morning with Micron executives and U.S. Commerce Secretary Gina Raimondo that she had not yet read the indictment but would soon do so and then offer detailed comments on the charges.
“I’m going to take the time I need to review this indictment, see what’s embedded with this, but my number one responsibility is to make sure the people of New York city and state of New York are served,” Hochul said.
The governor later issued a statement saying she was giving Adams a few days to “review the situation and find an appropriate path forward to ensure the people of NYC are being well-served.”
Lawyers in Hochul’s office yesterday internally discussed the legal and constitutional framework for removing an elected official, according to two people familiar with the conversations who were granted anonymity due to the sensitive nature of the talks.
FBI agents seized Adams’s phone at Gracie Mansion just hours before the indictment was made public.
At a raucous press conference outside Gracie Mansion yesterday, hecklers shouted over the mayor as he denied the charges lodge against him and dismissed the indictment as a “story,” asking New Yorkers to “wait and hear our side of the narrative.”
Adams’ attorney is requesting that the mayor’s first appearance and arraignment are both held on the same day (instead of split up over two separate dates) and that it would be their preference to do this on Monday or Tuesday of next week.
Adams is now scheduled to appear in court at noon today for his arraignment.
“I will be back and I will stand with my brother,” Adams aide Lewis-Martin said from Japan where she has been on vacation – an absence many noted. “And anyone who doubts that has clearly lost their mind.” She said that she is returning to the U.S. today.
Public Advocate Jumaane Williams said: “It is federal officials’ obligation to prove their case, it is the mayor’s obligation to prove to New Yorkers that there is a real plan and path to govern the city effectively and regain trust, and his time to show that plan is rapidly running out.
As of yesterday, at least 42 elected officials have publicly called for Adams to step down.
The uncertainty surrounding Adams has fueled rampant speculation that the former Gov. Andrew Cuomo may enter the mayor’s race. “He’s previously said he has no plans to make plans, and that hasn’t changed,” Cuomo spokesman Rich Azzopardi said.
Donald Trump said he had predicted that Adams was going to get indicted, adding: “And I was exactly right.” The former president also said of the mayor: “I wish him luck. I don’t know anything about what he did.”
Asked if he thought Adams should resign, President Joe Biden said, “I don’t know.” Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer hasn’t called for the mayor’s resignation, either, nor has House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries.
The Rev. Al Sharpton pointedly declined to defend Adams, saying his lawyers were still reviewing the charging papers. He said he had called a meeting for the weekend with around a dozen Black leaders, including Jeffries and Rep. Gregory Meeks.
The New York Times editorial board, while no longer issuing candidate endorsements, did call on Adams to resign, saying, “He would better serve his own case and the needs of the city’s 8.3 million residents by stepping down as mayor.”
While City Hall staffers said agency work is continuing apace, some said the turmoil surrounding Adams could mar administration priorities, like a high-profile zoning plan slated for a City Council vote this fall.
City investigators seized cash from safes at the New York City Sheriff’s Office, which has raided hundreds of illegal cannabis shops and confiscated millions of dollars in proceeds and merchandise, according to a spokeswoman for Adams’s administration.
New York City Sheriff Anthony Miranda is reportedly under investigation over an allegation he solicited donations for a law enforcement organization he leads in exchange for looking the other way on subjects of enforcement.
DOI investigators seized body cam footage from the sheriff’s office along with more than $100,000 in cash during the raid, sources said. It’s unclear if any devices or records were taken. DOI spokeswoman Diane Struzzi declined to comment.
The probe is being handled by the Department of Investigation after a complaint was recently lodged against Miranda.
Biden signed a temporary government spending bill that keeps agencies operating into December, after Congress punted key spending decisions until after the November election.
Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky’s visit to the White House yesterday may have been his final chance to convince a receptive American president of his country’s war aims.
Vice President Kamala Harris said so-called Ukraine peace plans from “some” in the United States are proposals for surrender during an appearance alongside Zelensky, who has come under Republican fire this week.
Trump said he would be meeting with Zelensky today, a move that came after the former president had earlier reportedly rejected a meeting with the Ukrainian president.
Harris reignited conversations over possible carve-out of the Senate filibuster rule to establish a right to abortion at the federal level, a prospect some Democrats in Congress are leery of.
Harris has proved to be a disciplined and effective debater and a tireless campaigner, nimble and energetic in rallies. But one-on-one televised interviews with journalists have long been a weakness in her political arsenal.
Harris sat for her first solo interview with a major cable network as the Democratic presidential nominee this week.
Harris’s top strategists are making the seemingly audacious case that she will not only neutralize the longstanding Republican edge on economic matters but also flip the script entirely by Election Day.
Some judges in a New York appeals court appeared receptive yesterday to possibly reversing or reducing a civil fraud judgment that stands to cost Trump nearly $500 million.
Melania Trump, the former first lady, said that she blamed “leaders from the opposition party and the mainstream media” for creating conditions that led to two assassination attempts against her husband.
Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani was disbarred in Washington yesterday, months after he lost his law license in New York for pursuing false claims that then-President Donald Trump made about his 2020 presidential election loss.
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said the Israeli military would keep striking Hezbollah militants in Lebanon with “all our might,” even as the United States, its European allies and several Arab states worked furiously to negotiate a three-week cease-fire.
Thousands of demonstrators took to the streets of Midtown Manhattan to protest Israel’s war in Gaza and its recent strikes on Lebanon, denouncing Netanyahu, who had arrived in New York ahead of a scheduled address to the U.N. General Assembly.
Hurricane Helene moved into Georgia early this morning, after pummeling Florida’s Gulf Coast with heavy rains and fierce, whipping winds that sounded like jet engines revving.
Although Hurricane Helene has now weakened to Category 1 intensity with winds of 90 mph, it’s going to continue its track inland with heavy rains when it crosses through Atlanta, Georgia, and makes it way towards Tennessee.
Packing 140-mile-per-hour winds when it made landfall, the Category 4 storm was the most powerful to ever strike Florida’s Big Bend region.
The forecast arrival of another hurricane seems like a recurring nightmare for residents of Florida’s Big Bend and eastern Panhandle.
The number of customers without power has risen to nearly 2 million across four states, with the majority in Florida. But the total is rising in Georgia.
Following a dramatic increase in illegal immigration along the U.S.-Canada border, U.S. Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand is championing bipartisan legislation to strengthen enforcement along the world’s longest international boundary.
Three months after Hochul indefinitely paused the congestion pricing tolling program, its supporters are heading to a New York court today to try to revive it.
New York State Democratic Committee Chair Jay Jacobs has been reelected to a sixth term, the organization announced, retaining the party’s leader as it looks to this fall’s elections to come back from some electoral setbacks in the last few years.
Jaywalking is slated to be legalized in New York City after the City Council passed a bill yesterday to revoke the NYPD’s authority to give tickets to people for crossing the street outside of a crosswalk.
A 28-year-old Oklahoma resident was sentenced to 22 years to life in New York state prison for fatally stabbing a man in an Upper East Side apartment in 2020, the Manhattan district attorney’s office said.
The City Council is considering a plan to take properties from negligent landlords who skip out on property taxes and endanger their tenants, reigniting a debate over an earlier program that had a disproportionate effect on small homeowners of color.
A Rikers Island correction officer who had already been accused of sexually assaulting at least two women while they were incarcerated is also accused of sexual misconduct by another former detainee in a new lawsuit filed against the city this month.
The Western Regional Off-Track Betting Corporation hopes to have current Buffalo Mayor Byron Brown serving as its president and CEO by its next meetings on Oct. 23 and 24.
The director of the New York State Writers Institute issued a statement apologizing for the institute’s handling of a panel that was abruptly dropped from the program for last Saturday’s Albany Book Festival at the state University at Albany.
Southwest Airlines will be starting a new nonstop service from the Albany International Airport to Nashville International Airport beginning on April 8.
The Hudson Valley Community College Foundation recently stripped former Albany County Airport Authority CEO Philip F. Calderone’s name from an economic driver award that he was slated to receive next month at the foundation’s annual gala.
Albany County is seeking to sell the former Heritage Park site to the New York State Division of Military and Naval Affairs to construct a new division headquarters for the New York Army National Guard’s 42nd Infantry Division.
Former Syracuse athletics booster Adam Weitsman said in April he was willing to donate to Siena men’s basketball to help new coach Gerry McNamara, his good friend. He’s now following that up by contributing $10,000.
Thomas McTygue, believed to have been the longest-serving commissioner on the Saratoga Springs City Council, died on Tuesday evening from complications of blood clots in his lungs. He was 83.
The Food and Drug Administration has approved the first novel antipsychotic treatment in decades, a drug developed to treat schizophrenia without disabling side effects like weight gain.
The new drug, Cobenfy, influences dopamine levels, but it does so indirectly, by changing levels of another neurotransmitter, acetylcholine.
“Today” show favorite Hoda Kotb announced she’s leaving the morning program after 26 years. Just weeks after celebrating her 60th birthday, Kotb broke down in tears as she revealed live on-air that she will be leaving “Today” in the New Year.
Photo credit: George Fazio.
